It can be awkward if you haven’t been there in a while. At first, I need to orient myself to the right marker. Then I gaze down at the names. I recall the faces. I study the dates…my how long it has been. I look up at the clouds and think about the image, the picture…but seriously, why did I come here? I look back down. I silently utter words of endearment, but they are awkward after all because I haven’t uttered them in a while. I purposely refocus in earnest and tell them I love them. I give the Mother’s Day greeting and I give a heart felt thank you. I scrape some tried, dead grass off the marker. I walk back to my rig, feeling more fragile, more vulnerable. I miss them.
3 Responses to “In Remembrance…Happy Mother’s Day”
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May they rest in peace – I lost my Mum to cancer in 1992 and every day I talk to her softly, with Love, in my inner voice. Remembrance is vital, and we must celebrate the privilege of being at the core of their lives. Peace and respect – metiefly
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This especially hits home. My mom passed in October last year. I think it will always be difficult to find the words to lay the bridge between the living and the dead. At times I give in to the hallmark sentiment that “they are still alive” at others the cold stone reality that she isn’t is all I know. I was no less than 5 minutes from her grave this mothers day weekend. Home bound with dad and wife in tow, after visiting my brother’s family who lives near by mom’s resting place, I turned onto 95N harangued by one of her guilt laden tirades and didn’t stop to see her. The miles wore on, her voice fading and all that was left was the assurance that she wasn’t angry. She wasn’t sad. She wasn’t lonely. She is still alive.
It will never be easy. It will just get better—that’s life.
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Beautifully said!
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